This weekend my good friend Rich Kao came to visit from Vancouver, Canada. Our time together was a trip down memory lane as well as countless hours of catch up and connection.
You know you have a good friend when you pick them up after midnight at the airport. Even better friend: you stay up until 3:30 a.m. talking!
Through this journey, I have received such an incredible outpouring of love and support. It’s really made me appreciate my friends. I am going to school on how to come a better friend to others. Here are four ways that people have been a great friend to me.
Text and care. I have a friend who has texted me every day since this craziness started. He just pings me with a check in to see how I’m doing or a word of encouragement. It’s not long, but it’s always on time and on point. Send a friend a text and care.
Listen and hear. Another person has been an amazing listener. I’ve had the privilege of being there for him and now he’s returning the favor. He knows how to listen. Pro tip on listening: if you withhold jumping to giving advice, the person feels heard and understood. And you will really understand them at a deeper level. There’s probably someone you could call this week with the intention to listen and hear.
Offer to help. A common comment is “let me know if I can do anything.” Totally heartfelt and sincere but practically not helpful. Why? You’re not going to call someone up and ask them to do something for you. Awkward. Here’s the key: be specific. A friend offered to Nana, “I’d like to run errands for you on Thursday afternoon. Would that be helpful?” Ahhh… yes. I’ve had a couple specific and crazy helpful offers. Next time you have a friend in need, I’d encourage you to offer to help in a specific way. You’ll have a blast and be a great friend.
Do something fun together. A great gift in the middle of adversity can be a distraction of normal life or just an enjoyable afternoon. If a friend is going through it, you may be able to lift their spirits by not discussing the issue. Pretty simple, easy and maybe just what the doctor ordered. Rich and I went out to shot clay pigeons for the first time in his life. Got the video to prove it. :-)
It’s surprising how a little kindness goes a long ways. I think we can get overwhelmed with the thought of being a great friend, but sincerely caring and reaching out in small ways makes a huge difference in someone’s life.
Proverbs says, “A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Prov. 18:24 ESV).
Having a ton of FB or Insta friends doesn’t satisfy the soul. Being a friend who sticks closer than a brother will pay massive dividends in your life. What are some others ways that someone has been a great friend to you?